My Rants

Petrol Prices

2009-01-02T18:27:00.000Z

Why do Petrol Prices vary so much, this really annoys me, OK I can see why the Shetlands might be a tad more expensive then the North of England where I live, but let me give you an example.

I use www.petrolprices.com to compare petrol prices... its normally very accurate, in and around my location the price is currently 85.9p per litre, but less than 10 miles away its 82.9p per litre.... why ? it cannot be down to distribution codes, so what is it ?, this price difference is actually pretty big, my normal fill is around 55 litres which is £1.65, it almost cheaper for me to drive 10 miles to this petrol station !

Come on petrol companies, give us the same price, you money grabbing buggers.

Kids Toys

2008-12-30T19:42:00.001Z

I’ve just spent Christmas morning attempting the impossible, no, not trying to break into Fort Knox, no, that would be easy, instead I have been trying to extract my kids toys out of the boxes they came in.

Why the hell does Upsey Daisy have rope around her neck ?, plastic ties that are impossible to cut with a knife around her legs and arms, which have been tied together by a 10,000 tonne tying machine !

I don’t know why this is, I know it’s pretty recent, is it to stop thieves from nicking the stuff out of the boxes ?, that’s easily fixed, seal the damn boxes, or is it some stupid EU directive ? I would love to know.

What I do know though is that the house is littered with potentially dangerous bits of cable ties, which you simply cannot find once you have used a Stanley knife to cut them, mainly because you lost sight of them when you screamed after accidently cutting your finger trying to cut the bloody things... then 2 hours in hospital waiting for a tetanus.

Royal Mail

2008-12-15T20:40:00.000Z

Now I know I could be accused of bleating on about Royal Mail, but yet again they amazed me. Today I received a package that was posted 10 days ago, this was a first class item. As it needed a signature I asked the postman why it had taken so long for something in their own words should take between 1-3 days.

He reply was, its Christmas.... which I responded, of course it is, that makes it OK then, after all, it’s not like we have Christmas every year is it, or if you bothered to check the previous 100 years worth of history you might of realised that you will be a bit busier.... so ramp up !

Car Garages

2008-12-06T11:45:00.000Z

I’ve had a little issue with the car lately and its proving to be a little difficult to fix, OK so some things are not easy to find and fix, but it’s the way they work that really annoys me.

So, the garage takes a look at my problem, it’s going to cost £120 to fix it, for some new parts and labour, I give them the go ahead. I pick my car up, 30 yards after leaving the garage the problem reappears, so I turn around and go back. The garage says, oh it must be something else, and that’s going to cost you another £150, OK I say, so I owe you £30 then I say to them, there was a rather puzzled look on their faces.

Come on I say, you charged me £120 and didn’t fix the issues, therefore put my original parts back on my car, and replace the new parts and I’ll pay you the difference ! well all hell broke loose then.

You see it doesn’t work like that, the garage can have as many goes as they like in not fixing my car and charging me, and it appears that it’s OK as I am footing the bill. I had the same issue with my boiler, they are all bastards and something should be done to outlaw this practice.

0870 Numbers

2008-11-26T09:13:00.003Z

Let make this simple, these numbers should be banned FULL STOP. Can you imagine buying a sweater at M&S and finding out something is wrong, so you go back to see customer services, when you get there as soon as you enter the queue they start asking for money, that is exactly what these companies are doing. Of course the funny thing is the government is getting in on the act as well, the DVLA made over 3 million pounds on 0870 calls last year !, I wonder by Ofcom are doing very little.

I have a prime example of this rip-off practice, Jet2 lost my seat booking last year, a booking that I paid extra for, I had to ring them (they don’t have email !), I sat in the queue for 20 minutes, then when I got through they said my seat had now been booked by another passenger so I had lost it, after arguing and then trying to get my booking fee back, the total call was 35 minutes. However much I argued they would not give me the cost of the call back, in the end I realised that it was going to cost me more in call charges than the refund so I had to give up, they are scum !

On the other hand though, Virgin, if the fault is down to them they refund the cost of the call, well done Virgin.

Police and Identity

2008-11-18T17:45:00.000Z

I read that Police may start using fingerprint scanners on the streets, but of course the lobby of privacy campaigners are dead against it, these people are idiots.

I am all for a) Finger printing and b) DNA records being held for everybody in the UK, also any visitors to the UK, as a law abiding citizen why would I not be ?

Why would the police or anybody else be interested in tracking me, or looking into my privacy, it’s a joke, they are far too busy looking for real criminals. Let’s look at some fact’s, a rapist could be caught within hours, a murderer who leaves a finger print, or any crime that the criminal leaves some form of evidence; the police could identify the criminal within hours, why is this not good ?

So come on, let’s do it and find all the arseholes in the world and lock them up (I guess we had better build lots of new prisons first).

Oil Prices

2008-11-17T09:58:00.001Z

I have always been told that competition is good, the more people offering goods the better, also I believe it is illegal for competing companies to get together and price fix.

So tell me, why does this happen with oil, which idiot decided that the worst most important commodity should have a set sale price for all, be traded by idiots only interested in what model car to buy with their massive bonus and finally allow the production to be governed by people who’s interest is to keep the price high.

Surely we should be creating competition to reduce the price, not allowing idiots to trade oil, it’s too important to the world.

Keyboards

2008-11-12T09:39:00.001Z

Now I am a computer professional (sounds a bit grand does that!), and I can type faster than I can write, I have been using keyboards for over 20 years and there is one thing that pisses me off, manufactures that constantly play around with the position of the keys... STOP IT

Clearly I don’t mean the standard QWERTY layout, but the other keys and also shapes of the keyboard.

Why make the left shift so small you can never hit it, why make the delete button so small you cannot hit it, why make the Enter Key only one key high instead of 2, why put other keys in the left control key position (this control key and the left shift key are used loads by keyboard short-cuts by the way), why curve the complete keyboard, why move the insert, Home, Page Up & Down) keys to be vertical, why make the function keys touch sensitive...... I could go on and on and on

The keyboard has a very basic function, the original designers knew that the keys we use the most should be big, so stop mucking around with them and leave them the way they were originally designed.

X Factor

2008-11-09T19:21:00.000Z

OK so I know I am letting myself in for a barrage of abuse, but I do like watching X Factor.

This week again Simon complained about the public voting being rubbish, and yes I have to agree with him, however what about the judges voting, it’s just as bad.

How the hell did Daniel stay in, I know his wife died and I so impressed by what he has done, but this is a talent contest, OK so they keep him in, why ? they know he is not good enough, that idiot Irishman keeps telling him how crap he is, but refused to vote him off, next time Daniel is up and sings a tear jerker is the Irish idiot going to keep him in again, no, so why get rid of Scott !

Same last week with that horrible Rachel girl, come on, there is no way she was better than Austin, and this week proved it with a terrible performance.

So Simon, before you complain anymore about the stupid public voting, get your judges in order first.

Oil Companies

2008-10-26T15:12:00.000Z

Its been far too long since I ranted, its about time I put that right.

What the hell is going on with Opec and the oil producing countries, they are now going mad because the price of oil is below $70 per barrel, I didn't see them doing too much when it was going up to $147 a barrel.

Do these idiots realise they are part of the reason the world is in turmoil, because of their utter greed, one of the main reasons prices of things has risen is because of oil, OK so they increased production "a little" to try and reduce oil prices when they were going up, but lets face it, they didn't try too hard did they. Now the shoe is on the other foot they are doing all they can to increase it.

Oil is too critical to the world, the price should not be left to Opec, maybe a world body like the UN should decided on the price of oil, the world would be a better place.

Bloody Rain

2008-08-19T20:40:00.001Z

Its been a while since I have Ranted about the weather so its time to put that right.

What another shit summer, I thought last years was bad but Jesus this has almost been as bad, it has rained every day except 2 where I live during August, and even the days it didn't the weather man forecast said it was going to rain !

I love the UK, its the best country on earth, I getting old though and I can't do with this shit weather, global warming my arse !

Royal Mail Part II

2008-08-14T08:20:00.002Z

Its been a while since my last Rant, and its about time I put it right...

My last Rant in April was about the Royal Mail Opt out scheme, well its not August and guess what, I still get all the shit put through my letter box, to cap it all, I went to pick up a parcel yesterday from the sorting office, 30 minutes it took ! I hate the Royal Mail.

Royal Mail Opt Out

2008-04-08T09:02:00.002Z

To try and stop loads of crap coming through my letter box, I have signed up to the Opt Out programs for advertising etc.

I have found out that you can also opt out of the hand delivered Royal Mail stuff, this is the unaddressed stuff that Royal Mail deliver, this is of course good news, however Royal Mail as being complete bastards with it.

If you opt out, not only do you stop junk mail but you also stop important government information leaflets, this is so wrong I cannot believe, Royal Mail should not be allowed to do this, how are they getting away with it.

Surely its easy... this advert for some insurance company only goes to opt in people, this government leaflet goes to everybody, how hard can it be, it's just an easy way for the Royal Mail to scare people into not opting out, its disgraceful.

To cap it all.... its says that we might still get some of this junk mail when they use temp staff ! clearly they don't know how to train people either.

Phones on Airplanes

2008-04-02T00:20:00.001Z

I shake my head in utter despair as I read a report that says airlines are going to allow people to use their mobile phones on airplanes.... what the hell.

Has anybody had the misfortune of sitting next to someone on a train making a call... HELLO ITS ME... it's horrible, the train (and airplane for that matter) are too loud, it disturbs everybody within 50 feet, come on can't you live without your phone for a few hours !! I for one can and welcome the fact that I am free from all the shit of everyday life.

Keep airplanes silent, keep mobiles banned.

More Than

2008-03-31T19:47:00.001Z

Today was the day that I had to renew my house insurance, so of course I went through all the usual web sites like confused, compare this and that.com, what was remarkable was the difference from £320 to £1,700, I just find things like this amazing.

Anyway my rant is with More Than, these were (see were - no longer) my insurers, the quote I got was pretty expensive to say the least, however I noticed that I had not told them about my loft conversion, so I now have 4 bedrooms instead of 3 - whoops.

Now these are the people who have fixed cover, buildings £500,000 and contents £75,000, pretty generous I would say, so image my surprise when they told me that increasing my bedroom count added another £90 to my insurance quote, how can this be ? the cover is the same, this just shows that this cover level is actually total bull, I will never use these people again.

Apple

2008-03-22T17:48:00.001Z

I have various apple stuff like a Nano, so I run iTunes on my PC, this of course means I am subject to Apple Automatic Update which no matter how hard I try I cannot switch off which really annoys me.

Anyway today it popped up saying I needed to download an update.... and oh what was it, the Safari Web Browsers WHAT !

Come on Apple this is truly ridiculous, not only are you telling me that I need an update for some software that is not installed on my PC, you are downloading a new browser, how dare Apple do this, it's like Apple downloading a new Word Processor even though I use Microsoft Word or Open Office, it's just wrong and Apple should be disgusted with what they are doing, it's clear to me they are trying to up the new of Safari but this underhand tactic is just wrong.

Once it's installed it will become the default browser on the system saying goodbye to IE or Firefox, I wonder how many people have fallen foul of this already and now use Safari (which is Rubbish by the way) instead of IE or Firefox which I am sure they were happy with before.

Smokers

2008-02-29T10:15:00.000Z

You will see from this rant that I don't smoke, however this rant isn't really about the act of smoking, whilst I hate being in a room full of smokers, its not an illegal activity and I have to put up with it, this rant is more about littering.

You see, smokers think its OK to throw away their fag ends into the street, you see it's not, it's littering, I eat Crisps but I don't throw away the packet, I put it in a bin. It seems to me that it's almost socially acceptable that smokers are allowed to throw their fags anywhere, well it shouldn't be, smokers choose to smoke and they should also choose to deposit their leftovers from this activity sensible in a bin once they have put out the fag.

Weather Forecasts

2008-02-21T16:10:00.001Z

OK so we all know that weather forecasters are rubbish at their jobs, I can't think of another job that allows you to screw up as much as being a weather forecaster, look below, the first is from www.bbc.co.uk/weather , look at Monday, then look Mondays at www.weather.co.uk, spot the difference... what a joke.

BBC

Weather.co.uk

Sky & BT

2008-02-18T21:11:00.001Z

OK so I decided to take Sky Talk, looked like a good plan, £5 per month for free calls to normal landlines, brilliant I thought, but no.....

For a start BT started charging me £4.95 for Caller ID because I was no longer making calls on their network, then I discovered that 0870 numbers are more expensive on Sky Talk and we seem to call these rip off numbers frequently, over all I was paying more, so I decided to cancel.

Everything went well, apart from it taking me 30 minutes on an 0870 number to cancel, it would be cancelled within 4 hours.

Tonight I discover that my phone no longer works, I get a Sky message saying that I have a reduced service and to call the rip off 0870 number, on what !, my phone isn't working... of course at a stupid cost on my mobile.

Sky now inform me that I need to speak to BT as my line is dead and reactivate my account with BT, Sky - why didn't you tell me this when I cancelled... great. So I call BT, they tell me I need to set-up a new account, with new costs etc..... but hang on, I already have an account with you, I pay line rental, also if I prefix my number with 1280 I get billed by BT instead of Sky, so I have an account... why do I need to do all this, but of course my ranting made no difference and I had to set-up a new account, guess what.... it takes 48 hours to set-up a new account so I have no phone for 48 hours.

Sky as bastards, BT are no better.... I am going to move everything to Virgin.

Hiring a Car

2008-02-18T10:41:00.000Z

Has anybody ever had the misfortune of hiring a car ?

Its the most unfriendly experience I think you can have, firstly you stand at the counter for 20 minutes whilst they type in all your details, come on how hard can it be, name, address, driving license details, why does it take so long.

Then you get your car, you need to go over it with a fine toothcomb, as if you miss that little scratch you can be sure the bastards will find it when you take it back. The thing is, the onus is on me to find it, if I don't I have to pay, this is just wrong, it has to be the other way around, the car hire company should have to prove the scratch was not there when you hired it.

I do have an exception to this, Dragon Cars in Spain, we hired a car and crashed it (not me somebody else !), there was a massive dent in the side of the car (actually this happened whilst driving it out of the airport, 2 minutes after we had hired it), when we took it back, they look at it and said... well that's why you have insurance and that was the end of the matter, brilliant service.

Hotel Rooms

2008-02-13T16:36:00.000Z

Something has always puzzled me about hotel rooms. What’s the first thing you want to do when going into a hotel room, is it to switch on the Toilet light ? well No.

So why the hell do hotel designers always seem to put the toilet light switch as the first switch when you enter your room, wouldn’t it be nicer to actually have the main room light switch, I think so.

eBay

2008-02-06T10:03:00.001Z

I read with interest the changes that eBay are making to the feedback system, basically stopping sellers from leaving negative feedback.

I believe the current feedback system is being abused by Sellers and this is why eBay are introducing this, today almost all sellers will not leave feedback until they have received feedback, thus they are abusing the feedback system. They are trying to protect their feedback rating by effectively bullying people into leaving positive feedback, if the buyer leaves negative feedback they will retaliate with negative feedback, this whole system is wrong.

When I purchase something my deal with the seller is over as soon as I pay, tt that point, assuming I have paid promptly positive feedback should be left by the seller, its then up to the seller to promptly deliver the goods and for the goods to be in then exact condition described, if they are not then they deserve negative feedback as they have not kept to their end of the deal (assuming the seller is not willing to put things right).

What eBay is doing though is wrong, as there are some bad buyers out there and these deserve to get negative feedback, I believe what they should do is not allow a seller to receive feedback unless the seller has given feedback to the buyer, however, if the seller gives bad feedback, the buyer should not be able to leave negative feedback for the seller as clearly the buyer has not kept their end of the deal.

iPod Touch

2008-02-01T17:32:00.000Z

OK so I have bought one of these little beauties, why I have no idea, for me its a waste of money I should of bought a hard disk version but I fancied the ability to surf the web over wi-fi.

Anyway apart from being upset by my stupid choice of the Touch, something has really annoyed me, and that's Apple charging £12.99 to get some applications that I feel should be free, namely, email, maps, weather and stock prices, however it doesn't stop there.

The main rant is over these new applications, firstly email will not connect to my STMP server because it requires SPA security, secondly maps searches America first, so I have to put UK after everything, Weather doesn't find Timisoara in Romania (when Yahoo weather does and that feeds the link) and Stock Prices doesn't give me monthly charts for half of my stocks, overall for something I had to pay extra for its rubbish and I am seeking my cash back from Apple.

Airport Lounges

2008-01-31T19:27:00.001Z

I am lucky (or unlucky due to the amount of flights I have to take to gain access), in that I can get access to these executive lounges at airports, I have to say that they are great, it gets me away from the normal holiday maker, they have free beer and snacks and the seats are normally large and comfortable, overall they are great.

Except for one small thing, they are filled with business men and women who in general have their heads stuck up their own arses.

Tell me why they have to wonder around with a Bluetooth headset, as soon as they sit down they take the seat next to them for their coats, no matter how busy the lounge is, and when you ask them to move their coats so you may use the chair they look at you with disgust (or maybe that's just me with my Orange County Chopper tee-shirt and big fat belly sticking out).

As soon as they sit down the laptop comes out, let play who has the best laptop (well actually that will be me, but I don't brag about these things).

Lovely places filled by arseholes, what a shame.

Its Just Stupid

2008-01-18T17:26:00.000Z

I read a report today on the BBC website about the air crash at Heathrow

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/uk/7196128.stm

I want to praise everybody on board especially BA staff, the pilots clearly did a fantastic job, the comment that got me was this from the BA staff on the ground looking after the crash victims

"However, there are some limitations to what we can do due to the various regulations with which we have to comply and the restrictions of operating in an airside environment. For example, we have to wait for permission to remove baggage and any other personal belongings from the aircraft. When that permission is received, our aim is to get these belongings back to customers as quickly as possible. "

What the hell... they need permission to get the bags off, what idiot decided to implement stuff like this, would anybody not want their belongings back, there credit cards, their clothes, stupid rules like this make me sick the person who made the rule should be shot.

Skype Blues

2008-01-18T10:18:00.001Z

I installed Skype on my home PC yesterday and yet more horrors awaited me, as in a previous post, why oh why do software vendors do these things.

Every time I start IE7 I get a Skype Help page in a new IE tab telling me about the IE add-on, come on Skype what the hell are you doing, I don't want this, I don't need this, you are a disgrace, lucky being somewhat of a PC expert I managed to disable said Help screen, but what about Average Joe out there with this bloody annoying pop-up every single time IE starts.

Talking of Skype though, whilst it is still the best... when it works... it appears to be becoming increasing bad in terms of sounds quality, and many re-dials are needed, I guess we can put this down to increased usage of Skype, but its funny that it started happening once eBay purchased Skype, maybe there is a link.

I remember when eBay purchased Skype, I said at the time it was a stupid move, I have no idea what they were thinking, the reason eBay is so good is that it's faceless and efficient, did eBay think people would be happy to spend all the there talking to one disgruntled client instead of looking after all their other clients... nope... eBay needs to start understanding their clients or they will become second fiddle to another auction house... it can happen.

Supermarkets, Chickens & GM Food

2008-01-17T13:54:00.000Z

I was watching the program on Chanel 4 about the chickens with the TV Chef's, it horrible what they do to the chickens as they grow, the supermarkets claim we want cheap food and that's the way we get cheap food, well no shit, of course we want cheap food, like cars and holidays and everything else, but cars are not £150 to buy are they, then I started thinking about GM foods.

Now I am no environmentalist, but I was thinking about GM foods, what's the point of them, who actually needs/wants them, I can only see one advantage, to the supermarkets, our Tomato's are all the same shape and bright red and they last 5 years before we get rotten, but at what cost.

It's taken nature millions of years to get us to the point we are in today, but scientists with less than a few years knowledge claim to know better, how can that be right, we simply do no know what we are doing and its dangerous.

The supermarkets have to stop all this activity now, its a total disgrace, stop the terrible treatment of chickens, stop GM foods. Using the excuse that we want cheaper chickens is total bollocks, put anything cheap in front of us and we will buy it, its just a price war between them all and the only winners are the supermarkets, if we don't stop the, who knows what damage they will cause.

PC Manufactures

2008-01-12T16:51:00.000Z

I got hold of my friends new laptop a few days ago, he asked me if I could set it up for him and put a wireless network in his house. The laptop he bought was very nice, but out of the box bloody slow... why... because of all the shit that they come shipped with.

Tell me why does the laptop come with 3 different Virus Software, 4 different ISP's, god knows how many other "Free Trials" of software, in total he had 15 things that started when his laptop booted up, now he has one... the Virus software.

These manufactures are giving the PC industry a bad name, just like the software vendors, why does every single piece of software now start-up automatically when the PC starts, if I want to run the bloody software I will start it, another fiend of mine had 33 items in the system tray, can you believe that, all casued by software that started when the PC booted, after I have finished he had 6, the rest now starts when he wants to use it.

Somebody has to sort all this shit out it a bloody joke.

Budget Airlines

2008-01-08T18:47:00.001Z

I read an article on the BBC web site about the extra charges from budget airlines,

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/business/7176401.stm

I booked 4 tickets to go to Spain this year, in total the extra charges were £201, what was at first a bargain soon turned into a cost which was a rise of 40% over our ticket prices, the one that got me was the credit card charge, £2 per person per flight ! which came to £16 credit card surcharge

Now I think paying for the services you take are fair, for example they introduced a charge for taking hold luggage, well if I only have hand luggage why should I pay extra, so this seemed fair but, when the airline introduced this charge, they did not reduce the ticket prices, so I was paying the same amount and everybody else was paying extra, its this practice that sickens me, its not about being fair, its about hidden extra's to increase their revenue.

The exact same flights last year were 35% cheaper than this year, virtually all of this was down to the extra charges, Budget... well not for long if they keep this practice up.

Sky Anytime PC

2008-01-03T21:30:00.001Z

I installed and used Sky Anytime for the PC, its good, I can download any film I wish to watch and then stream it around the house to watch on any TV it’s a nice service.

It’s just a shame about the crap software that it uses, well crap in my view in one way, when you install it each time your PC starts it runs the bloody program in the background, now as a little bit of an expert I can spot this and stop it running, but I wonder how many people out there are complaining like hell that their broadband link is slow, all because Sky has decided to use it up with their file sharing.

Now OK, without the file sharing it downloads would be slower, but file sharing should only work when you want it to, when you tell Sky to share, it’s terrible that Sky believe this is OK (Chanel 4 does the same and I am sure the new BBC one does as well), if they want to use my PC and Broadband then they should pay part of my monthly bill.

Tax Man

2007-12-25T20:42:00.001Z

2 rants today... well it is Christmas day

I got a letter from the Revenue yesterday reminding me that I had not yet done my tax return, OK that's fine, I have not done it yet no worries about that.

What was a worry though is that all of a sudden, my middle name was wrong, in fact, they had my surname as my middle name !, so I was Michael Prytherch Prytherch. I have been been doing tax returns for what seems like most of my life for some unknown reason (which must be the subject of another rant at some time), and they have never got my name wrong, well how can they, its all tied into the National Insurance number etc.

So why has my name been changed, with all the shit about the government departments losing CD's etc, this to me is just yet another indication of there total and utter incompetence, and it worries me.

Whilst on the subject of sending CD's, why the hell are they still sending out stuff by CD, they must surely have high speed connections between them these days to transfer files !

Rip-Off taxies

2007-12-25T20:25:00.001Z

At 6:35pm on Christmas Eve after a few drinks I caught a taxi from the main Taxi Rank in Harrogate, its only 1 1/2 miles to my house (no comments about how lazy I was... I was pissed) and I wanted to get home quickly to put my daughter to bed.

To my utter shock I was told it was double time, and to even step foot in the taxi cost me £5.40, of course I was 300 yards down the road when the taxi driver told me this, I of course complained like hell but still took my ride home, which cost me £9.20 to do 1 1/2 miles, as the taxi driver said, he doesn't make the fair, the local council do, not that he would be complaining about earning more money, after checking the council web site, the Christmas Tariff comes into force at 6:00pm Christmas Eve and runs until 6:00am on the 27th December.

What annoys me about this is that Christmas Eve is NOT a public holiday, everybody works on Christmas Eve, OK so I got a few sneaky hours off to have a beer or twenty with the boss, but I was still working, also I was not getting paid anymore than normal, so why should the bloody taxi drivers ?

Rip Off Laws and Airlines Taxes

2007-12-12T19:38:00.000Z

I had to cancel a flight a few weeks ago, I had booked the flight with Jet2, through talking with some people I discovered that although I cannot reclaim the Air Fair I should be able to reclaim the Taxes, as it turns out the airline do not pay the taxes if you do not fly, as the taxes were £41.95 I thought it was worth a go, so I did some research and also called Jet2.

Firstly the law is an arse, even though these are taxes, there is no law which forces the airline to pay back the taxes, now how can that be, I know that things like VAT have to be paid back, why is the law different for airline taxes ? this law needs changing now.

Secondly Jet2 charge... and wait for it £40 Administration fee to refund the tax, which basically means nobody will bother, or so they think. How can they justify charging so much, its a total joke, from what I have seen the only fair airline is Virgin who don't change.

It should be law that the tax is refunded less a "reasonable" administration fee which should be the same for all airlines, and this refund should be automatic.

I am now waiting for my £1.95 to be refunded to my credit card after a formal request to Jet2.

BBC Sports Personality

2007-12-11T16:36:00.000Z

I watched the show last Sunday and I must admit to be utterly disgusted by people voting for losers, now I understand that its called "BBC Sports Personality" but lets face it, its not about that, its about winners who we like.

I could not believe that the England Rugby team won the team award when they have won jack shit in recent times and came away from the world cup exactly the same as everybody else (apart from South Africa).... with nothing. Instead the British Track Cycling team who are the best in the world, a sport we topped the medal table at the World Championships, gets nothing, how can that be, a team of losers win against a team of winners.

I was ready to rant about another loser, Hamilton winning the overall award, but thankfully, the British Public (as apposed to the so called Experts who voted for the Team Award) voted for a Winner and WELL DONE JOE, after 10 years of being at the top you deserve it.

Its about time we took a leaf out of the Austrians and brought back pride in winning and stopped saying well done to losers.

Tiger Woods PGA Golf 2008

2007-12-09T10:40:00.000Z

Now I bought this game for my PS3 hoping it would be the best yet, but boy oh boy is it totally rubbish, I am so disappointed, its the most unrealistic golf game I have played, my main areas of criticism are:-

Putting is too easy and also the putting stroke it not realistic, you always get a full swing even in 5cm putts
If you drive onto another fairway you are always out of bounds, real golf is not like that
Drive into a hazard it at always drops the ball next to the hazard, in real golf (yellow staked markers) you can drop the ball as far back as you like
You put draw and fade onto the ball before you strike it... that's not real golf
If you hook or slice the ball, even just a little bit it takes 20% off your distance, again not realistic

Overall performing a drive or hitting a fairway iron is too hard, putting is too easy, its a horrible golf game, don't buy it, well... buy my copy off eBay.

Samsung U600 Mobile Phone

2007-12-06T20:14:00.000Z

Its been a while since I have ranted, its something I need to put right, so here is the first of many posts.

I have had this mobile phone for a while now and there are some features which are driving me mad, how anybody could design a phone with these features is beyond me.

It has a stupid touch sensitive Start and End buttons which you are forever hitting by mistake, what's wrong with normal buttons you press
When you set the alarm it defaults to the current time.... who the hell would want to set and alarm for NOW !!!, why can't it just remember the last time I set the alarm
If you make an appointment and you forget to set the alarm you cannot edit the appointment and put an alarm on, deleting and reentry is the only way
When you set an alarm on an appointment it puts the Alarm set symbol on the phone, therefore if the appointment if 2 months away I have the alarm set icon permanently on, which means I cannot tell if I have set a real wake me up alarm.
If you have more than one number on a contact you cannot set a default number to call
Text messaging is a nightmare, the End button is actually the Back button when entering text and the button labeled Back (one of the horrible touch sensitive buttons) is the End button which cancels the entry, and also if you hit End by mistake is asks you if you want to save it to drafts or exit, there is no way to cancel the End
When the battery is running out it plays a stupid tune every minute, just to make sure the battery run out even quicker
It has no Ring Ring as an incoming call alert, I am old, I don't want a stupid piece of music
When navigating around the phone it plays a stupid noise, the only way to stop the stupid noise is to turn off all sounds apart from incoming music

I could go on, the people who designed and wrote the software need shooting, the phone itself is lovely (apart from those annoying touch sensitive buttons), its just a shame the software designers were not as good as the hardware people.

Google Adds

2007-09-27T14:30:00.001Z

I've just posted my Magazine rant and went onto the site to check it out, for some reason Google Adds decided to put this on my site...

Now whats all this Sex Abuse stuff come from... what's on my Blog to make it think people need Sex Abuse adverts... not happy.

Magazine Dates

2007-09-27T14:26:00.000Z

What's up with Magazines, which idiot decided to put the issue date as the next month, I cannot see any logic and it confuses the hell out of me, I bought my favorite computer magazine today (sad yes I know), and guess what, its November edition, its not even October yet !!!, does this mean next month I can get my Christmas present, now... did I forget to buy Octobers edition ?

Come on.... but the issue month the same as the month it was released in.

Stupid Banks

2007-09-14T12:04:00.000Z

Got a letter today from the bank saying they are improving the security of the online banking by supplying all the customers with a card reader, the idea is great, you plug the reader into you computer, then to use online banking, you place your bank card into the reader and enter your pin code, so it works just like a cash point machine, but that's where its wrong, it doesn't work like that.

The card reader is only used when you perform certain operations such as set up a new beneficiary or a standard order, the most obvious place for this security is when logging in !!!, but no they have not implemented at that point.

So somebody could still hack there way into my bank account, they can no longer send all my money to themselves, but instead can pay everything to one of my existing beneficiaries such as British Gas and empty my account.

Yet another half arsed implementation from the bank, idiots.

Said But Ture

2007-09-05T07:53:00.000Z

I got sent this email a couple of days ago, its sad but true, this is the nanny state we live in.

NELSON SPEAKS TO HARDY ON THE EVE OF TRAFALGAR

Nelson: "Order the signal, Hardy."
Hardy: "Aye, aye sir."
Nelson: "Hold on, that's not what I dictated to Flags. What's the
meaning of this?"
Hardy: "Sorry sir?"
Nelson (reading aloud): "'England expects every person to do his or her
duty, regardless of race, gender, sexual orientation, religious
persuasion or disability.' - What gobbledegook is this?"
Hardy: "Admiralty policy, I'm afraid, sir. We're an equal opportunities
employer now. We had the devil's own job getting 'England' past the
censors, lest it be considered racist."

Nelson: "Gadzooks, Hardy. Hand me my pipe and tobacco."
Hardy: "Sorry sir. All naval vessels have now been designated smoke-free
working environments."

Nelson: "In that case, break open the rum ration. Let us splice the
mainbrace to steel the men before battle."
Hardy: "The rum ration has been abolished, Admiral. Its part of the
Government's policy on binge drinking."

Nelson: "Good heavens, Hardy. I suppose we'd better get on with it
........... full speed ahead."
Hardy: "I think you'll find that there's a 4 knot speed limit in this
stretch of water."

Nelson: "Damn it man! We are on the eve of the greatest sea battle in
history. We must advance with all dispatch. Report from the crow's nest
please."
Hardy: "That won't be possible, sir."
Nelson: "What?"
Hardy: "Health and Safety have closed the crow's nest, sir. No harness;
and they said that rope ladders don't meet regulations. They won't let
anyone up there until a proper scaffolding can be erected."

Nelson: "Then get me the ship's carpenter without delay, Hardy."
Hardy: "He's busy knocking up a wheelchair access to the foredeck
Admiral."
Nelson: "Wheelchair access? I've never heard anything so absurd."
Hardy: "Health and safety again, sir. We have to provide a barrier-free
environment for the differently abled."

Nelson: "Differently abled? I've only one arm and one eye and I refuse
even to hear mention of the word. I didn't rise to the rank of admiral
by playing the disability card."
Hardy: "Actually, sir, you did. The Royal Navy is under represented in
the areas of visual impairment and limb deficiency."

Nelson: "Whatever next? Give me full sail. The salt spray beckons."
Hardy: "A couple of problems there too, sir. Health and safety won't let
the crew up the rigging without hard hats. And they don't want anyone
breathing in too much salt - haven't you seen the adverts?"

Nelson: "I've never heard such infamy. Break out the cannon and tell the
men to stand by to engage the enemy."
Hardy: "The men are a bit worried about shooting at anyone, Admiral."
Nelson: "What? This is mutiny!"
Hardy: "It's not that, sir. It's just that they're afraid of being
charged with murder if they actually kill anyone. There's a couple of
legal-aid lawyers on board, watching everyone like hawks."

Nelson: "Then how are we to sink the Frenchies and the Spanish?"
Hardy: "Actually, sir, we're not."
Nelson: "We're not?"
Hardy: "No, sir. The French and the Spanish are our European partners
now. According to the Common Fisheries Policy, we shouldn't even be in
this stretch of water. We could get hit with a claim for compensation."

Nelson: "But you must hate a Frenchman as you hate the devil."
Hardy: "I wouldn't let the ship's diversity co-ordinator hear you saying
that sir. You'll be up on disciplinary report."

Nelson: "You must consider every man an enemy, who speaks ill of your
King."
Hardy: "Not any more, sir. We must be inclusive in this multicultural
age. Now put on your Kevlar vest; it's the rules. It could save your
life"

Nelson: "Don't tell me - health and safety. Whatever happened to rum,
sodomy and the lash?"
Hardy: As I explained, sir, rum is off the menu! And there's a ban on
corporal punishment."

Nelson: "What about sodomy?"
Hardy: "I believe that is now legal, sir."
Nelson: "In that case............................... kiss me, Hardy!"

USB Charging

2007-08-20T07:59:00.001Z

Now... I travel a lot and I have a standard Travel Pack of electronic gizmo's that I like to take with me, these are Mobile Phone, iPod and Nintendo DS.

Luckily all of these will charge through a USB port on my laptop, so in theory I would need to take one cable, but no how wrong can you be, each one of them has their own style of USB end that plugs into them, and none of them are in the format of a standard square USB or Mini USB connector, so there are at least 5 variants that I am aware of.

Come on manufactures sort yourselves out and settle on one format, today I need to carry 3 different cables.

Time is up

2007-07-28T09:53:00.000Z

I was going through some photo's on my PC, a bunch were from last New Years Eve party, this one made me laugh, clearly you can see that things have moved on since our younger care free days.

Not sure if this is a good or a bad sign.

Leaflets

2007-07-20T18:37:00.000Z

So today I have had no fewer than 11 different leaflets posted through my letterbox and quite frankly I am really fed up with them.

I don't want them, they go straight into the bin, I want some government legislation to ban leaflets, they serve no purpose, get rid of them.

Stuff in Letters

2007-07-17T16:57:00.001Z

I got an invitation to a wedding today (well actually its a Civil Partnership !), and the envelope was very nice and so was the actual invitation, but why oh why do people insist on putting stupid little heart shaped things in the envelope, bloody dozens of them, so of course I pull out the invitation and they go all over the bloody floor, it took me ages to pick them all up, what's with people, stupid idea.

Legal Crap on Emails

2007-07-16T09:51:00.000Z

Legal Crap on Emails

This has long been a major rant of mine, all the shit that appears at the bottom of emails, its total shit created by lawyers.

Why do we have to have all this shit, when I write a letter I don't put this shit on the bottom, if I talk to somebody I don't have to say this shit, so why with emails.

I sent a friend an email today, below is the email, I thought about removing the company name from the email but then I thought... name and shame, especially since its repeated, so they can't even be arsed to check what they send out.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I am out of the office and will be returning Monday 23rd July. I will have no email access during this time. If you require assistance, please contact CODA UK Support on 0845 3458595 or visit our website http://support.coda.com.

Support Desk (UK callers): 0845 365 2632 - calls charged at local rate
Support Desk (non-UK callers): +44 (0)1423 509999
Support Email: uksupport@coda.com
Support Fax: +44 (0)1423 530525

This e-mail has been sent by CODA plc or one of its subsidiaries (CODA GB Ltd or CODA Group International Ltd). The information in this message is confidential and may be legally privileged. It may not be disclosed to, or used by, anyone other than the addressee. If you receive this message in error, please advise us immediately. Internet emails are not necessarily secure. CODA does not accept responsibility for changes to any email which occur after the email has been sent. Attachments to this email may contain software viruses, which could damage your systems. CODA has checked the attachments for viruses before sending, but you should virus-check them before opening.

CODA plc: Registered in England 5861419
Registered Office: Methuen Park, Chippenham SN14 0GB
CODA GB Ltd: Registered in England 3909530Registered Office: Methuen Park, Chippenham SN14 0GB
CODA Group International Ltd: Registered in England 3938996Registered Office: Methuen Park, Chippenham SN14 0GB

Please don't print this e-mail unless you really need to.

OCRA a big appetite for Group Consolidation
Are manual or spreadsheet based systems for group accounting giving your finance team indigestion? OCRA could be the remedy you need. Click http://www.coda.com/ocra for more information.

This e-mail has been sent by CODA plc or one of its subsidiaries (CODA GB Ltd or CODA Group International Ltd). The information in this message is confidential and may be legally privileged. It may not be disclosed to, or used by, anyone other than the addressee. If you receive this message in error, please advise us immediately. Internet emails are not necessarily secure. CODA does not accept responsibility for changes to any email which occur after the email has been sent. Attachments to this email may contain software viruses, which could damage your systems. CODA has checked the attachments for viruses before sending, but you should virus-check them before opening.

CODA plc: Registered in England 5861419 Registered Office: Methuen Park, Chippenham SN14 0GB
CODA GB Ltd: Registered in England 3909530Registered Office: Methuen Park, Chippenham SN14 0GB
CODA Group International Ltd: Registered in England 3938996Registered Office: Methuen Park, Chippenham SN14 0GB

Please don't print this e-mail unless you really need to.

Weather

2007-07-14T20:46:00.000Z

Simple..... I HATE THIS COUNTRY the weather is totally shit, I am not amused, how long are we going to have this shit weather for, summer, what bloody summer.

Rip-off Leeds Bradford Airport

2007-07-06T09:13:00.000Z

I am not having a great time at the moment with my flying, but yesterday I made a quick flight to see a client, I arrived in the car park at Leeds Bradford airport at 5:30am, I got back at 9:00pm, a total of 15 1/2 hours, how much did I have to pay £19.... what a complete and utter rip-off

I Hate Insurance Companies

2007-07-02T07:43:00.000Z

My car insurance is due for renewal, I get a reminder through the post and guess what, its gone up, now I have maximum no claims discount, and was expecting an increase, but NOT 23%, yes 23%, its gone up to £440, its unbelievable.

So I rang More Than and asked for an explanation, which they said the market has just gone up, they offered to reduce it by £40, but there is no way I am going to do that.

Anyway, over the weekend I went and did some checking, on confused.com, Admiral insurance will insure me for £232, that's not far off half price, and guess what, More Than also quoted me a price on confused.com..... £276 what a bunch of wankers.

Airline Staff as Thieves

2007-06-11T23:16:00.001Z

I was on a plane last week, when I got off I realised that I have left my Sony PSP in the seat pocket, of course I am an idiot, anyway, I went straight to the Customer Services desk and told them what I had done, it had been no more than 5 minutes since I got off the plane, I was also the last but one passenger to get off.

Anyway, I bet you can guess, when they checked the seat pocket.... well nothing was there, what a surprise, I bet that's made a nice present for somebody, stealing bastards.

British Gas

2007-06-04T21:40:00.000Z

I watched with interest the new British Gas advert, stating its the only energy supplier who has cuts its bills twice..... Well for a start they needed to as they were about the most expensive, but call me cynical, what a good time of the year to cut Gas and Electricity costs, in the summer, the time when it will hit them the least... I wonder if they will go back up again as the weather turns cold and the day get darker.

Funny Things Kids Say

2007-06-04T21:38:00.000Z

I know this is suppose to be a ranting blog, but over the weekend my daughter who is about to celebrate her 3rd birthday came out with some classic one liners.

We were watching the Moto GP bike racing on TV, she looked at me and said... Daddy they need cars... pointing at the world class bike racers on TV

Following on, later that day we went to an historic car festival at Harewood House, all these lovely cars are on display, we walked up to this old Jag, the owner had the bonnet up so that we could see that fateful V8 in it, my daughter walked up to the owner, looked him straight in the eye and said..... I'm sorry you car is broken, it needs a new battery, Daddy can fix it for you.

And some things you don't want to hear, Daddy, I've done a Poo.... its a smelly sticky one.... can you change my nappy please.

Rubbish

2007-05-28T10:49:00.001Z

I read a report over the weekend about the new rubbish collection, this government is making me sick. For a start they are planning on reducing the rubbish collection to once every 2 weeks, surely there is a heath issue with this, secondly, if you decide to take your rubbish to the tip yourself you will be fined, what the fuck has got into these people's head, are they truly fuckwitts or what.

So, instead of upgrading the rubbish collection service, they are going to spends thousands of pounds on number plate recognition system to log your movements into and out of the rubbish tip, what the hell !!!, this means that the council will have access to complete DVLA records which also cannot be good, the reasoning for this is that if we need to take our rubbish to the tip we are producing too much so we will be fined.

What the fuck are these guys thinking, do they believe that I get up in the morning and say to myself, I know, today I create loads of rubbish, I don't and I suspect nobody does. How about stopping junk mail, that accounts for a bin full of shit every week, how about getting supermarkets to reduce the packaging on goods, how about stopping other companies putting everything into massive boxes, all my rubbish is created by other people, I already recycle everything I possible can and if industry helped by reducing packaging I would have less to recycle.,

Come on you government fuckwitts stop making these stupid decisions, your policy is aimed at the wrong people and it WILL increase fly tipping, wake up and resolve the real issue.

Things are too complex

2007-05-24T09:33:00.001Z

I have decided that we make things too hard for ourselves and I have come up with a solution to identify if things are wrong.

My daughter is almost 3 and like most 3 year olds she is asking about things, I explain to her and she either understands or doesn't, so this rule of thumb should be used from now on, if a 3 year old can understand it... its fine, if not it's too complex and should be reworked.

I use an example, British coins, why are £1 smaller than 2p or 50p ?, explain that to a child, that the small little £1 is actually worth more than the 2p, you can't, why ? because its stupid.

Credit Card Security

2007-05-24T09:29:00.000Z

I read with interest all this fuss about TK Max giving away 45 million customers credit card details, the press saying how they must guard information more closely, well that's not the answer.

I was a consultant working in a company which took credit card payments, one day they handed me a file with some data I needed, I needed just some information like Name and Address, anyway this file not only contained what I needed, but also the credit card details of each person as well, I had only been in the office 2 hours !

The answer is simple, if you use something like world pay, as a merchant the credit card details are not passed to you, only world pay have them, thus stopping stupid companies like the one mentioned above having to worry about ensuring their procedures are tight.

Bottom line is companies cannot be trusted, therefore this information should not be given to them.... simple

Thought my Luck was In

2007-05-20T08:34:00.000Z

Let me set the scene, I live next door to a couple of lesbians, a few days ago there was a knock on the door, it was one of the lesbians, she looked at me, smiled and said they needed a man, imagine my surprise and pleasure, a dream come true.

So around I went only to be discover that they were doing some DIY, trying to fit a Cat Flap to their back door, of course I helped them out and left disappointed.

What is it with lesbians and pussy's.

A Little Story

2007-05-18T20:54:00.000Z

A man was sitting in his living room one Saturday, when he saw the women who lived across the road come over and knock on his front door, said man answer saying hello to his neighbour, she replied by saying she needed some mussel and would the kind man help her out, of course said the man and off they went to her house thinking she needed something heavy moving.

On entering the house the woman says to the man, the 3 of them are up stairs, a Taxi Driver and his 2 foreign girls, they have been having sex all night and will now not leave, so will said man go up stairs and remove them. Of course, said man looks at the women in amazement, is she serious, what if these people have a gun or knife, why has the women not called the police. Wanting not to look like a wimp, the man walks slowly upstairs and says Hello, no reply, so he walks into the spare bedroom to find nothing, only 2 suitcases, he shouts down to the woman and says there is nobody there, women replies by saying they are hiding, so man has to check every cupboard, under the beds etc., but nobody is found.

He walks back down stairs to talk to the women and explains that nobody is there, women says they are upstairs as she can still hear them, man now is a little worried, so he goes upstairs again to check, nobody there, women now asks man to bring suitcases downstairs as they are there’s, this he does. At which point women opens one of the suitcases saying that one of the foreign girls is hiding in the suitcase!, once discovered it is empty, she turns to the man and says, they are still upstairs, but they can make themselves flat so you can’t see them, at which point, man very nervously says there is nobody in the house and makes a polite exit.

Holy shit, said man is now shitting himself as he clearly has a nutter living across the road from him, I’m looking for a new house.

Sun Pat Peanut Butter

2007-05-04T07:56:00.000Z

This morning I decided to have a treat, so Peanut Butter on toast was my breakfast, unfortunately my wife had decided to decimate our supply of peanut butter, leaving only the dregs left in the bottom.

So here is the complaint (no not the wife for a change), why oh why do Sun Pay have a stupid expanded bit at the bottom of the jar, the peanut butter is almost impossible to extract from this ridge, I'm going to invent a Sun Pat peanut butter extraction tool to help people get all their peanut butter out of the stupidly designed jar.

But then I thought... what a good ploy by Sun Pat, if you can't get all the peanut butter out, you will have to buy more jars.... ummm interesting

Sofa Update

2007-05-03T21:18:00.000Z

Bloody company has gone into liquidation.... I'm stuffed.... unless credit card can do something.... its with them now.

Diet Bloody Diet

2007-05-01T23:07:00.000Z

So tell me, why are all the nice things to eat really bad for you, too much sugar, too much fat, too many calories, I'm getting pissed off now.

Its not that I am going to fall off the wagon and go back to my crazy days of having the old pie or 50, but I just want something that is nice. I had a look at Olive Oil today (cooking dinner), shit have you seen how many calories are in a tablespoon of Olive Oil.

I therefore have a great idea to make myself lots of money, invent a food that tastes as good as Fish & Chips but has the same calories and fat content of a piece of lettuce.... there you see it is easy to make money, I'm off to invent my food now.

Old Car Drivers

2007-04-30T11:36:00.001Z

I was following this old bastard driving some shitty little car over the weekend, 40 miles an hour he was doing at best ! with nothing in front of him for miles, he was driving so bloody slow everybody in front had long disappeared into the distance.

Due to the volume of traffic I had no way of overtaking him so I had to sit behind him for 25 miles !

Two things irritate me about this, the first is he should be driving faster, its was a clear sunny day, he was holding up everybody behind and you could see how annoyed the people behind me were. The second thing was when we reached villages and the speed limit dropped from 60 to 30, he still did 40 miles an hour, therefore breaking the speed limit, these people should have their driving licenses revoked.

Bloody Sofa

2007-04-25T18:54:00.000Z

Finally after a 2 1/2 month delay my new Sofa's arrived... brilliant except for one small rip... bastards

Another Reason Why Vista is Shit

2007-04-25T18:51:00.000Z

When using an SD Card from my camera which normally has hundreds of pictures on, selecting 4 or 5 to copy off it takes bloody hours, on XP its really quick, Vista its unusable, I suspect its because it wants to read all the data for all the pictures instead of just the ones I want.

Man Vista is pissing me off.... don't waste your money on it.

And I still can't print from IE7 on Vista to my HP Printer.... everything else prints fine including IE7 on my XP machine.... Bloody Vista

Rip Off Prices

2007-04-23T11:13:00.000Z

I got some spam email today from play.com, of course the spam worked because I read it doh !

The thing that caught my eye was the price difference, there was a Toshiba Laptop for £380 and a Nokia N95 Mobile phone for £480 (SIM Free), now come on, how can the cost of manufacturing a laptop be less than a mobile phone. I understand that price takes into account research, distribution etc. etc., but this just shows me we are continually being ripped off by over inflated prices for things... I mean I can purchase a DVD player for £19 these days.

Call Centre Phone Calls

2007-04-20T14:54:00.000Z

It's been a while since my last post so I thought it was about time I sorted myself out.

I took a call today from BT, this guy said it was BT and that he needed to talk to me about my last bill, so I said OK.

At this point he came out with the usually crap of data protection and started asking me some questions, at which point I stopped him and said hang-on, you prove to me who you re first, he started to get irate and kept saying he was from BT and I said how the hell do I know that, which he replied by saying, tell me the information I am asking you and I can then tell you details about your account, ummm I thought, so I tell you information about me first and then you will confirm back to me who I am..... no thanks good bye.

This brings out an interesting point, why should we trust these callers, how do I know it was BT, the fact is we don't and it could easily be somebody trying to get information out of me, my advice, never take unsolicited calls like this, call centres need to come up with some way that proves who they are just like we need to prove who we are.

Strange but true....

2007-02-26T21:00:00.000Z

I was shopping today and as I am attempting to loose weight I am paying attention to the nutrient content of food.

I picked up a Weight Watchers Pizza (yes they exist), looking at the per 100g nutrient information, it stated that there was 176 calories and .8 grams of saturated fat, next to it was the per Pizza total, this was 236 calories and .9 grams of fat, nothing too sinister there I hear you say, except the Pizza was 100g in weight.... how can the nutrient information be different then !

Perfect Deodorant

2007-02-25T18:04:00.000Z

I've just taken the kids to the local swimming pool, afterwards I had a shower, in fact as the wife had 2 kids to dress I spent at least 15 minutes in the excellent showers at the pool.

So tell me, why as I write this, do I still stink of chlorine (or whatever stuff they put in the pool), I mean, 15 minutes of cleaning and it still doesn't get rid of the smell, if you could make chlorine smell nice and bottle it, it would be the perfect deodorant as it never fades and even lasts through showers !

Damn Tip

2007-02-21T16:47:00.000Z

I popped down to the local tip today, I'm all for recycling and I had some old Mountain Bike tyres that I needed to throw out.

Now the tip is split into different areas depending on what you want to recycle, so I drove to the various parts and unloaded by stuff, finally I spotted a pile of car tyres so I figured that is where I should put by bike tyres, so I drove to that place. As I was about to throw the tyres onto the pile one of the site supervisors stopped me... "Hey... that's for car tyres only, those need to go in the Non-Recyclable bin"... of course this was the other side of the yard where I had already been to, anyway, my mistake so I walked across the yard to this area.

I was just about to throw the tyres into the recycle bin when another supervisor (a different one) stopped me and said... "Hey... those should go on the car tyre pile over there"... I stopped looked at him and uttered the immortal phase "are you guys taking the piss or what... I've just been sent over here by that supervisor there as he said these don't go on the car tyre pile"

Anyway... I made him take my tyres back to the pile of car tyres..... of course as I was walking back to my car which was still parked next to the pile of car tyres, I thought maybe that was a little selfish making him carry them when I'm walking back.... sod it I thought.

Bloody Blogger

2007-02-14T11:18:00.001Z

OK, so we now have Version 2 of the Blogger, this morning when I signed it, it v made me convert to Blogger Version 2, so I thought... why not... so I did.

Now... the bloody thing does not work with Vista !!!! I cannot post anything using my Vista PC, this post has been created using my work PC which is running XP

Bloody Blogger

New Road Tax - Petition

2007-02-14T11:10:00.000Z

Sarah Kennedy was talking about this proposed car tax scheme on Radio 2. Apparently there is only 10 days left to register your objection to the 'Pay As You Go' road tax.

The petition is on the 10 Downing St website but they didn't tell anybody about it. Therefore at the time of Sarah's comments only 250,000 people had signed it and 750,000 signatures are required for the government to at least take any notice.

Once you've given your details (you don't have to give your full address, just house number and postcode will do), they will send you an email with a link in it. Once you click on that link, you'll have signed the petition.

The government's proposal to introduce road pricing will mean you having to purchase a tracking device for your car and paying a monthly bill to use it. The tracking device will cost about £200 and in a recent study by the BBC, the lowest monthly bill was £28 for a rural florist and £194 for a delivery driver. A non working mother who used the car to take the kids to school paid £86 in one month.

On top of this massive increase in tax, you will be tracked. Somebody will know where you are at all times. They will also know how fast you have been going, so even if you accidentally creep over a speed limit in time you can probably expect a Notice of Intended Prosecution with your monthly bill.

If you are concerned about this Orwellian plan and want to stop the constant bashing of the car driver, please sign the petition on No 10's new website (link below) and pass this on to as many people as possible. Sign up if you value your freedom and democratic rights -

Click On Here.... http://petitions.pm.gov.uk/traveltax

And don't forget to acknowledge the government's return email when you get it or your objection will not be registered

Sky TV

2007-02-06T20:16:00.000Z

Now I have Sky TV, well I actually have Sky+, which I must say is the best TV viewing and recording system going. The thought of living without Sky & Sky+ is now unthinkable for me, after all each night I sit in front of the TV scanning 250 channels looking for something to watch, but of course, its all crap, but imagine how boring it would be scanning just 5 terrestrial channels.

This is not my rant though, each month I see £43 disappear out of my bank account to Sky for all these 250 crap channels and I ask myself this question, I pay £140 (or whatever it is these days) for my BBC License (lets not get into the technicalities of the license fee, we know all the money goes to the BBC), the benefit is of course -- no adverts. Sky on the other hand gets £500 per year from me and the bastards still have adverts, for Sky its a win...win and a lose...lose for me.

Damn Sun

2007-02-05T15:21:00.000Z

I'm sat here working, its a nice sunny winters day, due to this I have the blinds closed. Tell me, how does the bloody sun always find the little holes in the blinds that the cord run's through and how come those little holes are always lined up directly in your eyes.

Natwest Mortgage - What a Con

2007-01-31T10:29:00.000Z

I recently took out an Offset Mortgage arrangement with Natwest, and this month see's my first payment, but boy have I discovered a complete scam which I am going to take up with the Financial Ombudsman, it works like this.

Lets say my mortgage is £100k
Each month Natwest adds to my account the interest due on that Mortgage, this is the 24th in my case, so on the 24th they add on £700 in interest, making the total I owe them £100,700
My payment for the interest goes out on the 1st of each money, so on the 1st, £700 goes into my mortgage account to net off the £700 interest.
All seems fine, but actually it isn't, because even though interest is applied to my account once a month, it is actually calculated daily, so for 7 days they calculate interest on £100,700... making my interest payments higher

This may not seem much, but work out how much extra interest I will pay on £700 for each month of my 25 year mortgage, it is significant, imagine how much extra you would pay also if your interest is applied on the 2nd of the month and you pay on the 1st, you will have 1 extra months interest to pay.

When I challenged Natwest about this, they simply said, yes... that is what happens, its not up to them to point this out, of course, I have now changed my payment date to the 24th to net off this interest, but this means I have to pay my mortgage twice this month which I am not happy about, I am also claiming back my extra interest I have paid this month. I would of thought a bank would have better scruples.

When is a Pie Not a Pie

2007-01-23T12:30:00.000Z

Today while I was having lunch I was watching the UK TV Food channel on Sky. As always there is a chef who cooks something, normally these are really good, but today this guy made my bloody boil.

He started by saying he was going to make a pie, so he put some beef in a pan, browned it off, added some other ingredients and gravy, he then placed this in a dish and proceeded to top this dish with puff pastry and put it in the oven.

THIS IS NOT A PIE.... this is a casserole with some hairy fairy puff pastry sat on top.

A pie has to have a pastry base, it is then filled with the filling, then a lid of pastry is put on top, the filling should be raw or partially cooked so that it completes its cooking in the pie in the oven AND the pastry is Suet or Short pastry NEVER bloody puff pastry.

I have sent an email to complain about this so called pie to the TV station, I await their reply.

I'm After Damages

2007-01-19T18:33:00.000Z

You see, last week I did a very stupid thing and fell off my bicycle, actually it was a bit of a freak accident, but anyway, a trip to the hospital, an x-ray later and a confirmation that I have broken my collarbone, in fact my left collar bones is now in 4 pieces.

Anyway, it hurts, I can only type with one hand (using Vista Speech Recognition for this blog entry), its going to take at least 12 weeks to heal and on Tuesday the doctors are going to decide if it needs to be pinned in place.

So, I am going after some damages for my crash, not from the bike manufacturers, not from the Manchester Velodrome but from the government, you see, its these bastards that keep telling us to exercise more and lose weight, become healthy.... if they would of left me alone eating crisps and drinking beer in front of the TV this would not have happened... its there fault.

Big brother racist

2007-01-17T18:27:00.000Z

I have been amazed today by all the media attention big brother is getting with these alleged racist attacks on one of the contestants. I find it amazing that the British and Indian governments have actually got involved, do they not have anything better to do?

I have seen every programme and in my view there is not one racist incident, yes we have a group of people who have ganged up on another contestant, but this happens on every single show. Without trying to sound racist, but if this person was British I do not believe anybody would think anything was wrong, but because this is a movie star from India, the actions of the other contestants are deemed as racist.

This is yet another example of everybody being over sensitive and too political he correct, this is not racism, this is just what happens in the real world, we are by nature pack animals, and we will gang up on people we do not like or agree with, so come on get off these people's backs and stop being idiots.

Ranting Mikes Memory

2007-01-16T21:11:00.000Z

You know what, Ranting Mike is going to rant about himself, why....

Throughout the day many things I see and read make my blood boil, when I get home in front of my PC I have forgotten about them and therefore can't Rant about them..... I guess its good for my bloody pressure.

I am in the wrong ??

2007-01-07T16:43:00.000Z

Now, normally I not one to ask for an opinion as I am always right, but something happened today.

I was shopping at Sainsbury's and was walking down an aisle pushing my trolley, there were 2 guys chatting, not paying attention and had blocked the aisle totally with their trolleys, of course this is normal for women to do.

Unlike a woman though, one of the guys spotted me and moved his trolley out of the way so I could get past, I walked past and didn't say anything, the guy who moved his trolley shouted at me "don't say thanks then will you", at which point I turned and said, don't block the aisle next time either.

So, should I of said thanks or not ?, this guy had blocked the aisle, something he should not do, when he unblocked it I was suppose to say thanks, why should I say thanks for him to sort out his crap trolley parking. As always, I believe I was correct, manners are great and should be used, but are we taking it to far when we have to thank somebody for changing something they should not have done,
? I'm not sure.

Bloody Paint

2007-01-05T09:25:00.000Z

Over Christmas I have had the misfortune of having to decorate, it would of been better to work !

Anyway, I dispatch myself to the DIY store to purchase some paint, oh dear, what I thought would be an easy task turned into a nightmare, which one !!!, I don't mean colour, I mean, which type of paint, should I purchase a non-drip type, anti-yellowing (what ever that is!), one that hides cracks, one that doesn't smell, one that only needs one coat (guaranteed apparently), one that goes on pink and then turns white, one that is washable.

No thanks, I don't want to choose, I want the one that is washable, doesn't drip, stays white, hides the cracks, doesn't stink the house out for days, will cover everything in one coat and changes colour, unfortunately, the man in the DIY store just laughed at me, surely that's an idea though.

MBE Bloody Joke

2007-01-02T10:17:00.000Z

I have just looked at the new years honors list for sports people, and I am amazed that (or maybe I shouldn't be) Zara Phillips has got an MBE, whilst she has done amazingly well to win both European and World titles in the same years, its pretty much all she has won on the world stage, lets look at Gareth Edwards, who got a CBE, he is well old, played Rugby all his life for both Wales and the Lions, he is regarded as one of the best every Rugby players, it has taken a lifetime of excellence to get his CBE, and Zara gets an honor after just one good year, it just not right.

Some fucking car driver

2006-12-31T14:05:00.000Z

Well happy Christmas to us, yesterday, I woke up and looked out of the window, to find that some cunt had driven into my wife's car and ripped of the rear bumper and ripped the side of her car, of course, this fucking arsehole cunt wanker shit head left their name and number, no, did they fuck, instead we are left with an insurance claim that fucks up our no claims.

Happy Christmas you mother fucker, I hope somebody does the same to you and burns your fucking house down.

Mortgages

2006-12-18T13:17:00.000Z

I'm just going through a remortgage of my house, and what a complete bush of arse holes NatWest are.

It started off so well, a simple telephone questionnaire which took 30 minutes, then a few days later I got the filled out form that... "all I needed to do was sign".... I wish.

The application form contained over 30 mistakes, including some classics....
My NatWest (yes I bank with them) account details wrong, including the wrong branch
My current lender was wrong not to mention my account number with them
My wife's middle name as Shaun... that is my middle name
Our house address wrong - pretty important as this is the house we are changing mortgage on
Now, I corrected all these errors on the form and sent it back thinking everything would be OK, oh how wrong. A couple of weeks go by and I get a call from the NatWest Solicitors saying that my wife has changed her name and it does match the deeds, well she hasn't changed her name I think to myself, then looking at the letter and her name is still Shaun !!!!, NatWest have not changed her middle name.

So having no choice I ring up NatWest and ask them what is going on, there reply, well, if we recorded Shaun as your wife's name that must of been what you told us, come on, why would a) I give you the wrong name and b) give you a boys name. I then went on to check the other details that were wrong, and surprise, they had not corrected a single item from my corrections I sent in.

Why the hell do I have to sign a legal document that these arse holes don't even bother to check, in the end it also cost them money, as they sent the surveyor to the wrong house.... as they didn't correct the address either.

Idiots.

Microsoft Vista

2006-12-11T19:27:00.000Z

I have been running the full monty release of Vista for the past week, and after so many years of being in IT I should now better, but I didn't.

Firstly let me tell you, it should be called "Error" and not "Vista" as that's all I seem to get, of course the error messages are very nicely written, but they are still errors and they still stop me working.

What really pisses me off is the Vista compatibility program that I ran before hand, which said my PC was perfectly fine with everything it ran, what a complete loads of bollocks, just minor (no major) issues, such as my PDA won't sync, as it has Pocket PC 2002 on it and Vista only works with Pocket PC 2003 and you can't install ActiveSync either a Vista won't let you. At least twice a day the network just hangs and I have to reboot the PC, every time you try to do something, the screen goes blank and it asks if its OK to run this program or that program, its not saying don't run it as it might be a virus, it just wants to make sure I really intended to run it, well of course I did, I selected the bloody thing. I could go on, Zip which won't unzip anything, large files that just won't copy from one machine to Vista..... but I'll stop here as you will bored very quickly.

Now its not all bad, the interface is fantastic, the search is brilliant and overall one day it will be a good operating system, my advice, wait for service pack 1, you will need it.

Out Ranted

2006-12-08T17:19:00.000Z

I have to post this up today, the Ranter has clearly been out Ranted.

Shopping

2006-12-08T17:18:00.000Z

I have the misfortune of attending the wife's company Christmas party tonight, always a night to look forward to (NOT), but at least I get fed and have couple of glasses of wine.

Anyway, I look in my wardrobe for something suitable to wear and discover that I have not actually purchased any clothing (except Jeans and Tee-shirts) for the past 5 years and everything is worn-out, this being my worst nightmare.

I realise that a) I need to shop and spend some money and b) I can't use the internet as I need the cloths for tonight, so that mean one thing, I have to go into town to buy some clothes.

So I venture into town this afternoon, terrified, and what do I see.... a wall of people shopping, I mean, I can't move for shoppers, so what's going on, do people only shop at Christmas, what about the other 11 months of the year, the place was packed, of course, I thought, is everybody in the same predicament as me and need some clothing for a Christmas party ! maybe who knows.

Depressing

2006-11-23T10:17:00.000Z

And whilst I am on a real rant, I've just picked up my wallet which is serious bulging, I took out all my credit card receipts to make it a little less bulky.... and there is no money in it, its empty, it was just full of receipts... man I'm depressed

What no Porn !!!!

2006-11-23T10:12:00.000Z

I was just looking at Chanel9 which is a software developers web site, on there it had a link to an area where people told everybody else of the 5 favourite sites they visit each day, I looked long and hard down the list (check out www.tv-links.co.uk), and not one Porn site was listed, bunch of no good geeks, I'm changing profession, I can't be associated with people who don't check out at least one porn site a day.

And Everything in the World is Installed

2006-11-22T08:45:00.000Z

These days, when you install software on your PC, you don't just get the software you have purchased, you get loads of other shit you don't want with it. The situation is totally ridiculous, I could end up with so many bloody search bars in IE that I would have no room for the content of pages, Yahoo, Google, MSN, EBay !!!

Not only that, but they want to load every single program into the system tray at start-up, I loaded iTunes latest version and got Quicktime as well, OK so this is required for iTunes, but why does it have to be in my system tray and load every time my PC boots, thus slowing everything down, OK as a computer professional I know how to hack things and remove it, but I have been to friends PC's that are slowing dying because of all this shit that gets loaded, its about time this practice was stopped.

Why can't things just work

2006-11-21T21:09:00.000Z

I have used a web site called XDrive for ages, I use it to backup my data off-site, I pay for the service but its has been excellent, until now, AOL have bought Xdrive and have totally screwed it up, half the time I can't logon, files are corrupted which is great for a backup !!!

So My Mate Phil (see right hand side link.... can't be arse putting in the hyperlink here) told me about streamload.com, this is free for the basic account, you pay if you want something a little bigger, well, I uploaded 2 files 4 hours ago and they still don't appear in My Files... rubbish... back to finding another site.

Politically Correct World does it again

2006-11-19T12:02:00.000Z

I read this article on the Times Online web site the other day, basically it is forcing a sausage manufacture who call's one of its sausages Dragon Sausage (due to its fiery nature) to change its name as the sausage does not contain any Dragon meat.

http://www.timesonline.co.uk/article/0,,2-2458696.html

Come on, this world has gone too far, lets force McDonalds to change the name Hamburger to Beefburger as it contains not ham, or a Sheppard's Pie to something else as it contains no Sheppard and its not even a pie !

These poeple need to get a life.

Motorway signs

2006-11-10T19:59:00.000Z

I was driving back home today on the motorway, and I passed one of those new very large information signs, these signs I believe that cost £100k each. Anyway, it has a message Don't Drink and Drive... very good advise I am sure, what would of been better is a useful message such as.... 1/2 mile down the motorway you will come across a 5 mile tailback due to an accident.
What a waste of money

Too Tired

2006-11-01T10:20:00.000Z

I can't be arsed to update My Rantings, I'm too tired, the new baby is keeping me awake all night and I'm even more grumpy than normal.

Wife's Rants

2006-10-25T15:31:00.000Z

On Tuesday morning 3:50am the latest addition to my household arrived, a lovely little girl (even though she looks like a boy) called Chloe, 6lb 10oz.

Now as you know this is a ranting site, so after 4 hours of labour my wife decided to have a rant at me, so I decided to give her her moment of glory and give a lesson to all you expectant fathers not to make the same mistakes I did.

The Gas & Air is for the mother, don't nick it, they get upset
When you wife is having a really bad contraction and has her head down in the bed with her arse in the air, don't slap it and shout "nice arse"
If during a contraction your wife farts, don't tell the midwife as soon as she walks into the room that the smell is your wife, strangely they both shouted at me
During a contraction don't say to your wife... "come on suck it up", I was actually meaning give a good suck on the gas an air, wife thought I was telling her just to take the pain
Once baby is born and you have been holding her for 20 minutes and your arm starts to ache, don't ask the wife to take over as you have a pain in your arm, apparently, a little pain in the arm is nothing compared to giving birth !
Don't complain that your wife is squeezing your hand so tightly that it hurts, against small amount of pain is nothing compared to giving birth
After the birth, the midwife brings in some tea and toast, don't eat all the toast while your wife is having a bath thinking "she won't want to eat after all that

I live and learn.

Shopping & Women

2006-10-25T15:12:00.000Z

I believed that the ability to shop was in built into women, so tell me this, why are they always surprised when they have to pay.

Today I was in a card shop, surprisingly buying a card, as usually I had to queue, I am in the queue for 2-3 minutes when the women in front finally gets to the counter, she hands over the card, the shop assistant then tells her how much, she then spends 5 minutes hunting around her hand bag looking for her purse !!!!

Come on... why don't you do something that doesn't come naturally, realise that you are going to have to pay and while you are waiting in the queue, look for your purse in your oversized handbag.

Sign Writers

2006-10-17T12:56:00.000Z

I got this sent to me today, made me laugh even though its not a laughing matter, which idiot thinks of these signs !

Boys will be Boys

2006-10-15T17:37:00.000Z

I was talking to my 13 year old niece, she was telling me that she has just been threatened by the head master of her school with exclusion i.e. kicked out of school.

Strange I thought as she is a good student, so I asked her why, she said that 3 lads of her age were ganging up on her and giving her a hard time, so what did you do I asked, beat them up she replied. So that's why the headmaster went mad with you, because you beat up 3 boys, yes she replied.

So why were they giving you a hard time ? I asked, to which she replied, they didn't believe I am a black belt in Karate, I guess they do now I replied, she just smiled back at me.

Boys will be boys.

Sunglasses

2006-10-12T09:14:00.000Z

I bought some Nike sunglasses yesterday, excellent deal, 75% of retail price.

Got them home, cleaned them, look fantastic, feel fantastic, very happy, I start reading the leaflet that comes with them, under instructions it says "do not leave in direct sunlight".... have I made a mistake ?, I thought these were sunglasses.

Magistrates

2006-10-11T13:32:00.000Z

In a previous blog entry I talked about the unbelievable decision to fine a driver who killed 4 cyclists £180 when he was driving a car with 4 bald tyres.

Yesterday I heard about another unbelievable decision by these magistrates who clearly hate cyclists. A guy cycling home from work was moving quickly down a hill heading towards a roundabout, before he got to the roundabout he moved into the middle of the road to stop cars passing him as he approached the roundabout, the idea is that it is not safe to overtake a cyclist going around a roundabout.

A Policeman saw this manoeuvre, arrested and charged him, the guy appeared before the magistrates and was fined £300 for "inconsiderate cycling". Now lets not debate if this guy was within his right to make this manoeuvre, lets just say for argument sake he was wrong to do this, but how can he be fined £300 for obstructing traffic for 50 meters, when a guy who kills 4 cyclists and gets £180 fine.

On another cycling theme, there is talk of making bells a legal requirement on bikes, failure to have a working bell, £2,500 fine !, what fine do you get if you car does not have a working horn, £60 fixed penalty and an instruction to get it fixed, and what good are bells anyway, cyclists are not allowed on paths, only cycle paths and road.... I can see myself telling the police after a crash that I was ringing my bell madly, but the car driver did not hear it !... idiots..

Now I don't want to sound like a mad crazed cyclist, I only cycle for exercise and fun, I love my car totally, the idea of sounding-off about this is not to have a dig for Pro Cycling, its about highlighting the injustice of our law's, this needs to be rectified and quickly.

Women Drivers

2006-10-09T14:53:00.000Z

It was bound to happen that I had to comment on women drivers at some point.

Let me set the picture for you, I live down a dead end road and its only wide enough for 1 car to drive down at a time, to get out you either have to reverse all the way up the road (150 meters) or try to turn around, which is impossible if the street is full of parked cars.

Anyway today as I left my house a women was trying to turn her car around in a very tight spot, I started shaking my head when I saw this, so she wound her window down and said "I am doing the women's thing of trying to turn around, please excuse me I am a women". So I replied, yes you are on both counts, why don't you just reverse, she replied "I can't reverse", I just left it at that.

How do these people ever pass their driving tests, if you can't reverse you can't drive, simple as that.

I felt justified in giving this post a "Women Drivers" title as 95% of the people who drive down my road and panic are women (Pete you drive like a woman so are included within the 95%), another story, one evening I saw this women starting to panic, she eventually got out of her car, knocked on my door, said she had driven down the wrong road by accident and can't get out, would I mind reversing car for her as she was stuck ! apart from the fact this women should not be allowed to drive a car, I was pleased as a) it meant I could laugh at her and b) she wasn't going to crash into everybody's parked cars while trying to reverse.

What's happening to me

2006-10-08T15:39:00.000Z

A few years ago I remember talking to a old college of mine and I said I would NEVER have a people carrier. Today I was coming out the gym (honest) with my wife and child, as I was stepping into my Renault Scenic people carrier, a new Ford S-Max drove past and I thought to myself, that's a nice looking people carrier, I will look at them when I come to replace the Scenic.

I can't believe I am dreaming about a people carriers, its all gone wrong..... I'm off to the pub now, get pissed, have a curry, go to a nightclub, attempt to pull a bird and talk about Ferrari's with my mates, assuming the wife lets me of course.

Women and DIY

2006-10-05T17:31:00.000Z

To be honest I am sexiest, but only to wind up lesbian feminists, apart from that I really couldn't care, but today....

I had to hang some stuff on the wall in our bedroom, this newly decorated bedroom with carpets, walls etc. all fresh and new, so I thought to myself, instead of making a mess over the new carpet when drilling holes into the wall, I would get the hover and ask the wife to stand next to me with the hover end below the drill catching all the mess, first class idea I thought.

So, I had four holes to drill very close to each other, I started drilling and completed the first hole and started the second, it was then I suddenly realised that the mess from the drilling was still falling and I could not hear any noise from the direction of the hover.... the answer from the wife... you never told me to switch the hover on, just to hold the hover pipe under your drill... DOH ! I live and learn.

Talking about lesbians, my neighbours are a pair of lesbians, the other day I took delivery of a large parcel for them, one of them came around to pick it up, so being the kind person I am I suggested that it was heavy and she needed a man to carry it.... strangely that comment didn't go down to well.... which brings me onto another story, I once worked in an office that had a women who used to be a man, the full sex change, I was talking to her (him !) one day, and she told me that she had some new alloy wheels on her car... so without thinking... my reply was "a bit of a boy racer are you !"... later (months later) I asked her if her driving had gone down hill since she became a women, she didn't reply.